Book Review: Love and Respect

by Emerson Eggerichs

I find this book to be confusing..because it's so simple, yet so expansive. The book is based on one simple concept, but is 324 pages long.

Mostly, I found the book was asking married couples to do what Courtney and I seem to already be doing. And I don't say that out of pride, hopefully. I just think that Courtney and I are both sensitive to each other by nature. Many of the examples put forth in the book were of situations where at least one of the spouses was a very self-centered person, and where there were serious problems.

But..I will say that I am definitely not perfect, and could show appreciation to Courtney more often. There are many ways that I could be more loving. The book purports that as I show more love, Courtney will show me more respect. If one person is not doing their thing, than the mature way to live is to continue to show love and respect, and to not base it on what the other person is doing. I think my childhood models showed this to me, and that is why this concept is not difficult.

I will say that my main complaint about this book is that there are hundreds of examples of "people coming up to the author" or "writing a letter to the author" about how his conferences and writings transformed their marriages. Without all of those examples, it could have been a 100 page book. I am wondering if the publisher thought the book would sell better if it was 300 pages. I am a cynic, but I think there might be some truth to it. Sometimes things are big business that you'd rather believe are not.

Overall, I'm a little confused about what to take away from it. I think watching the DVDs or being at a conference with Courtney would help to get more out of it.